Tired

I have been contemplating writing this post not because I was scared to speak up but because I wanted to use my voice in the most productive way. Far too often I was quick to speak, quick to get my anger and frustration out, too quick to tell people what I thought rather than moving the conversation forward. As good as it felt to get it off my chest, the aftermath of making more people frustrated, reducing the conversation, and not improving the problem, made it all pointless.

The first thing is that I truly have no words for the murder of George Floyd, the only way I can describe it is numb. Second, is that I am disgusted in the act of Derek Chauvin, sadly this is not a one-time occurrence and it is proof that black and brown people face a hurdle every day, that I cannot understand.

The feeling of helplessness I have watching the Twin Cities being attacked frustrates the hell out of me. It is tough to see something that you love to be attacked, destroyed, and hidden from its true greatness. One thing I came to realize is this is how black and brown people must feel every day. They see their friends and family dying because of discrimination and hate so often and feel so helpless in what they can do. In just a few days I have become pissed, I cannot even imagine what it would be like to live with it for your entire life.

Sadly just like everything, the small minority ruins it for everyone. No matter what side of the aisle you sit on, what your beliefs are, or the frustrations you have, please know that it is a small minority of people that ruin it for everyone else. They do not represent the majority. Their actions are not excusable but they do not represent where most people are coming from.

I am a financially a conservative and socially a libertarian, I mention this not to bring up politics but if you are reading this, I want you to know that support to change the inequalities, reduce privilege and stop the murders of people because of the color of their skin is not divided by an aisle. The support you will receive is not limited to one side of the aisle, one religion, one country, or any other thing you can think of.

I am not perfect and I realize that I have privilege just based on the color of my skin. We are going to screw up, make mistakes, and not do everything the best way all the time, please give us grace.

Here is an ask that I have for all of you, including our politicians. Please get out from behind your computer screen, camera and teleprompter and start seeing people. As efficient as it is to get your beliefs out and spread your message it is not effective. It is better to help one person than to spread your message to 100. I have felt helpless in the past, especially when facing such a big issue and one that requires so much work. It can feel like the only thing you can do is share, repost, and comment but that is not the case. If you want to make a difference, go help a person, start a conversation, or learn how you can improve your impact.

I don't know all the answers but what I do know is that I want to move the conversation forward, I want to improve the lives of everyone, not just a select group and I will not tolerate any form of hate.